INTERVIEW ONE OF ???

INTERVIEWER: Hello.

INTERVIEWEE: Hi. So what's up with all this?

INTERVIEWER: I just wanted to ask you a few questions about the effects of the experiments that were performed upon you.

INTERVIEWEE: What experiments?

INTERVIEWER: You mean to say that you don't remember any experiments?

INTERVIEWEE: Uh, yes. What exactly is this, what's going on here?

INTERVIEWER: Well, I'm just going to ask you a few questions and I'd like you to answer them the best you can.

INTERVIEWEE: Alright, alright. This shouldn't be long, should it?

INTERVIEWER: No, not at all. So, to start things off, do you see any animals in the room right now?

INTERVIEWEE: Well, of course I do, there's a crocodile right next to you.

INTERVIEWER: Oh, well has be been there long?

INTERVIEWEE: Well, yeah. He followed us in. What kinda queston is that?

INTERVIEWER: Is he saying or doing anything?

INTERVIEWEE: Not really. He's had a rough week at work.

INTERVIEWER: Why's that?

INTERVIEWEE: I'm not sure he'd want me to share. Hey, croc, would you mind?

INTERVIEWER: Uh, excuse me?

INTERVIEWEE: Don't interrupt him, man.

INTERVIEWER: I apologize.

There is a long silence, and the interviewee acts as though he is listening to someone speak.

INTERVIEWER: So, I'd like to move this along if you're willing. I believe I had asked you why this, croc, person was having a tough rime at his job.

INTERVIEWEE: Well, he just gave you the answer. Were you even listening to him speak?

INTERVIEWER: If you wouldn't mind summing up what he said, that'd be nice.

INTERVIEWEE: Well, basically his coworker, toucan, has been a total dick to him in the workplace, and HR won't do a damn thing about it.

INTERVIEWER: Well, that's terrible. Incidentally, are you experiencing similar issues in your workplace?

INTERVIEWEE: Oh, I don't have a job. Though I did deal with something like that before they canned me. Why do you ask?

INTERVIEWER: I'm just asking what I was told to ask you. Now, why exactly were you fired?

INTERVIEWEE: They thought I was insane. But, honestly, I think they were the ones who were insane. They kept on insisting they couldnt see the foxes that were there. It all kinda came to a head when one of my coworkers stepped on one of the foxes' tail, and all the foxes that were stacked on top of that fox came toppling down. I tried to defend the foxes, I got a little violent, and then they let me go later that day.

INTERVIEWER: These foxes, you mentioned they were stacked, and could they speak too?

INTERVIEWEE: Have you ever seen a fox without at least one other fox stacked on top of it? They're practically made to stack, and of course they could speak. I feel like I'm being messed with here, honestly. You're acting like you've never spoken to croc before.

INTERVIEWER: Well, that's all we have to do for today. You seem uncomfortable, so we'll just stop for now. Goodbye.

Index.